For our winter trip, Beau and I went on a 4 day cruise out of San Diego. Neither of us had been before, so we went with something inexpensive and short – San Diego to Catalina to Ensenada and back.

It was the perfect introduction to cruising, I think. I could tell that we were on an economy boat with economy food and economy entertainment. There are bigger better cruises for the taking in the future, yet all the while I was sound in the notion that I had most certainly never been on a cooler boat. It was a good tasting, and now I know I won’t get impossibly seasick or something.

I want to try an Alaska cruise from Seattle to avoid the crappy part of traveling and give the industry as a whole another shot. I am pretty sure cruising will turn out to be a bit too American Diet/Consumerism for my tastes.

The Elation strikes me as being pretty old as far as cruise boats go, it’s like an floating version of Old Vegas. You know at one point the amenities were the cream of the crop. As much as you know and appreciate that, you are also aware that they are no longer thus. For me, that just meant that the likelihood of my cruising experience getting better as I try them was high. I think that probably had to do with the cruise cost being about $180 a person.

The service on the boat was the most impressive part of the trip. After being made to stand in the pouring rain for over a half hour, being corralled into a huge cold warehouse space and accosted by photographers before even getting on the boat, I was skeptical – but the service on the boat was exceptional. Those people work their asses off.

The food was the most difficult part of the trip for me. I can taste and feel things like high fructose corn syrup and hydrogenated oils, and am currently suffering from what I suspect will be about a week of CruisePoo(tm). As far as I can tell the entire ship was outfitted by Sysco, and that alone was enough to paint a layer of gross on nearly everything I ate.

I had a hard time with the amount of plastic bottles/cartons on the ship and suspicion of where the seafood and meat came from. But when it came time for the desserts, I frequently forgot about all that. They were fucking good.  It’s, at the very least, interesting to go on one of these cruises if you’re aware of waste, and have preference toward real, fresh food.

Honestly, the ports we hung out in weren’t all that exciting to me. I grew up in California, so the landscape wasn’t very foreign in either place, and both are very touristy so it felt.. I dunno. Hollywood. Less so in Ensenada, but Catalina was a joke. Beaus excitement carried me, though, and I enjoyed being with him in both places a lot.

Even given the obviously Americanized nature of where we hung out, Ensanada was a great adventure and a lovely experience. We had the time to explore more in Ensenada and get away from the tourist places, but a bottle of rum and Disneys ‘Up’ (on a 17″ CRT or so, was suprised they didnt have flatscreens) took precidence, so we had a few beers and ate some lunch after walking the main shopping strip, haggling for trinkets and circus candy, and taking pictures of penises and horse shit signs.

The weather was pretty crazy the first night. The boat was being tossed around 20 degrees to either side, according to the level our dinner companion had on his iPhone. The winds were about 50mph, and I was only able to be comfortable while watching the water from our window. When I was able to see when we were rising and falling I was ok to lay down. Otherwise, I was mostly moaning and guhing and making weird noises, or childishly grinning and stammering around the boat.

The best part of the trip for me was the window in our room. It had a shelf on it big enough for me to sleep on.  Beau used the second blanket to make a nest up there almost immediately upon getting on the boat. I spent many hours curled up there napping and reading. I really loved it. Had I not been in the habit, I doubt we would have seen the dolphins we noticed while anchored in Catalina, either. I hope to get rear facing rooms in the future as well. One of my favorite parts of the trip was laying in that window, contemplating how much real water looked like Brice 3D.

The spa and pools were both forgettable. The spa, in particular, consisted of two small hot tubs with gross stuff floating in them. They also turned my grey and black striped bikini into a brown and tan striped bikini. The pools were 5′ deep, and had a water slide, but it was a bit too cold to try it and it seemed really slow when I watched people go down it. Color me unimpressed.

We didn’t really see any of the shows, played a bit of trivia in bars and gambled some and were mostly low key. My understanding of the shows based on the people we talked with who had attended was that we didn’t miss much. Seemed accurate, since nothing that was offered really piqued interest from either of us.

I had a nice trip, and a nice stopover in San Diego after the trip to hang out with friends and tour some breweries. Unfortunately, the day we were in San Diego before flying home, Norda was struck by a car and killed. She is currently in a box in my garage awaiting cremation.

Next time, I will fly home right after I get off the boat.